I LOVE DESARU NEWSLETTER ISSUE NO. 5

July 2006


EDITOR'S NOTE

With monsoon gone early March so has our will to continue with this newsletter. It is like a mourning period where lethargy and apathy abound. But with so many gossips and rumours swirling around, our civic duty compelled us to write on. Some of you have been asking about this too, which touched my heart since all this started as a big joke anyway. So with the whiff of the sea breeze half dead or alive in our minds depending on how you look at it, we trod on. Folks, here are old news re-dug, repackaged and represented to you…

Disclaimer: The articles featured here are based on words of mouth and assumptions and no verbal, mental or physical abuse shall be inflicted upon the writer of these articles.

Photo Contributors:
Kijal & Quarry Surf - Lang
Ripping Cimaja - Mick Hoult

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WHITE BOY'S TRIBUTE TO END OF MONSOON

On a hot dry Monday in March, upon the realization that surf season has probably ended, Ian 'whiteboy' got all emotional and sentimental and started to send us this long poem he composed in between filming takes:
(Warning: the descriptions below contain graphic references and innuendos)

"Yup, and I didn't get full blast of it. Gone were the days when the sets would hit me so hard (it) was like I was being raped by mother nature; tossed around and having the life of me sucked out. (When) the only thing I tasted was her sour salty bubbles, as if she had marked her territory at the roof of my mouth. That has never changed since the day I lost my virginity to mother nature back in 1998. Each season I wait to see what she can throw at me. Life's a tease: when it's too big, you're scared; when it's small you're mad. When it's just right, you're some bad ass looking for something better. Hmmm I'll wait for her the next round. To be continued."

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SURFER RIDES WAVES FOR TYPHOON VICTIMS

When typhoon ZanZhu hit the South China Sea in May, the menacing red dot on the surfcast website told us good rides were on their way down here. But it also meant that the typhoon would claim many lives in its wake. So Mike Lim, overcame by his humanitarian guilt, packed up and rode up all the way to Cherating to claim his prize. The rest of us lazy arse were obviously held up by work and many other excuses and have let the swell come and go.

While there Mike had skipped his lunch for three consecutive days to be in the water nonstop, losing weight but gaining muscles in the process.

Upon his return our reporter spoke to him. Obviously stoked to the nth degree, he sounded chirpy and had only this to say "With the typhoon claiming so many lives in its wake from the Philippines to Vietnam to China, I felt sorry for the victims and their families. But it's mother nature wreaking havoc, and the only thing I can do as a surfer is to do my best in riding all the waves that came my way, in that way I felt that I was paying tribute to all the victims who have died their unnecessary deaths."

Touching stuff.

What most of us missed

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BROKEN DOOR AND FISTS

They came, they saw, and they knocked down the door. Arriving at the watersport hut at midnight and finding the door locked and no key in sight, Ashik, Aidan, and Jamal decided that the most logical thing to do was to break the lock of the door so that they could sleep in. No surprise that it incurred the wrath of Abang Ramli the next morning when he got to his hut only to find his door had been opened by force by the people who are no strangers to the spot and who should've known better than to break your host's door. No sorry was offered apparently and a casual remark was overheard that the guilty party said that they'll just buy a new lock to replace the old one.

To add insult to injury, when Abang Ramli banned all vehicles to park at the hut area after the above incident, our gangster surfer friend Azai decided to do otherwise. When told by Abang Ramli's brother to remove the vehicle, the former started to throw fists in the air looking like to pick a fight, according to our source. This naturally caused Abang to become furious as he felt that people have been taking his generosity for granted.

Parking and staying over at the hut has now become a sensitive issue and we now know who we should all blame.

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INJURY SECTION:

Cheryl was injured late February and was bedridden for five days. Was it surf injury? Was it skate injury? No, it was occupational hazard caused by the little kids she has to deal with. She sprained her back and was bedridden for five straight days. However, on the first week of March she sneaked up for a surf trip to Cherating. "I can't stand it anymore! I need to go surf!" she exclaimed. Her folks were not supposed to know as she was supposed to be resting for another week. Asked if she had pictures taken of her being in cast she said, "Mad ah! In pain still want to take picture!" We thought it'd be cool.

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HASTA LA VISTA

We say adios to Karl "whiter than Ian" Wilcox. He headed back to his motherland in July to join his pygmy riding Cornwall swells. He lost his flip flops on his way to his farewell gathering held in Cheryl's flat, a quiet affair with only six of us present. Hope to see you back here Karlos.

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SAD NEWS

Cik Din's mother passed away after fighting years of illness. Our deepest sympathy.

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UPDATE ON WEIGHT LOSS COMPETITION

The weight loss competition between Ian and Fity has been postponed to some unforeseen future. The original bet stipulated that they were to lose five and two kilograms respectively. Due to many challenging obstacles, both parties have not been able to commit. They were unavailable for comments during press time.

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GOOD BUY

Booties were on sale in Ripcurl shop in Pacific Plaza with a pair going for as low as SGD14. Apparently nobody was buying them as there is no obvious use for them here. Ian and Max bought their pairs and Ian is now a happy owner of his first pair of booties. "They look marvelous!" he said proudly.

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SURF TRIPS

Christina and Junior headed to Phuket mid-July to Kamala and Surin beach to surf. The surf however has been disappointing and the two of them had spent more time shopping and cycling than being in the water.

Surfers from Down-under, Pete and Mick are offshore somewhere in Vietnam waters. Pete reported: "We didn't get any weather directly from the (ZanZhu) typhoon, but a couple of days after, we got 55 knot wind and 3 metre seas out here," which caused him "heaps of headaches". They had sent us pictures of them surfing Cimaja during the happier Chinese New Year time.

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