I LOVE DESARU NEWSLETTER ISSUE NO. 4 (THE REVELATION ISSUE)
February 2006
EDITOR'S NOTES
EDITOR'S NOTES
Another month has passed. We only have a few more happy weeks before we have to bid bye to our half yearly happiness. Not that I have been surfing much. Unlike some of you who have had the good forfune to go places. Frumph. So here to spark my own life I have divulged some shocking secrets for you all. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: The articles featured here are based on words of mouth and assumptions and no verbal, mental or physical abuse shall be inflicted upon the writer of these articles.
---------------------------------------------------------
OLD SKOOL LONGBOARDER DIRTY SECRET
Mike Lim has finally confessed to his favourite ocean manouevre: taking a dump in the sea. Taking a pee is no longer a secret for any of us. I know most of you would rather do it in the sea than take that walk all the way up to the nearest bush or toilet. But taking a dump?
"Everybody do it. There are only two sorts: those who confess and those who don't," quipped Mike.
Since this could be your survival tip, here are his tips:
1. Paddle outside to a quiet corner.
2. Remove boardshorts underwater.
3. Check the direction of current. You don't want the banana to float back to you.
4. Don't take too long. Some passing fish might just mistake your little member for some bait. Perform a quick manouvre. One push, one go. Just do it.
5. Put shorts back on.
6. Paddle back to the line up as if nothing happened.
So there you go, the art of taking dump in the sea. Any last words, Mike? "The sea's a big dumping ground anyway! That's what I call freedom!"
We'll be interviewing Ajill soon for his tips.
----------------------------------------------------------
THE INSIDE TRUTH ABOUT ANDI'S JEANS
-
Andi Lim has been abstaining from alcohol recently. That was strange until he confessed that his doctor had advised him against it. Upon futher probing he revealed that he had had an infection to his downunder member.
Too much sex, perchance? "No!" he vehemently denied. And so after some persuasion, it turned out that he is not in the habit of washing his jeans for months on end. Okey, so what, you asked, we all hardly ever washed our jeans.
Okey folks, get ready for this: Andi never wears his underwear. Not only when he's in the water but when he's about town shopping in his jeans or any trousers for that matter. "It's just too hot!" he said.
Maybe Max would like to give our Andi some advice.
----------------------------------------------------------
MARKO'S SPOTTED!
Despite his emotionally-charged
protests and pleadings, guys, check out Marko's new look in the attached picture. He was caught off-guard standing at Cathay Cineleisure by our paparazzi. He didn't want any of you to know, but yes, he has started his job proper. He even had his hair trimmed to suit his new look. What caught our eyes however, is his polished gold-buckle belt which shone even in this underexposed photo.
---------------------------------------
IAN'S DAYDREAMING
This comes from an sms Ian sent to one his pals last month that we managed to salvage from obscurity and print for all of you:
"Oh man that's the ultimate.. Check her curves out. Smooth, yet strong and firm. Won't bounce in the waves. She will hold her course. Step on her hard and she will give you good spray of delight. Think I can handle her for the whole day in 'saru. If I have the energy, might make it on Sunday. But I'm sure she will give me
the ride of a time, fulfilling my every need. Everything and anything you want. Sorry got carried away. Got to get back to work!"
Ian's obejct of desire? A 5'10" retro Fish.
----------------------------------------------------------
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Contest between Ian and Fity to lose weight has been postponed due to both party's reluctance to cut down on their unhealthy diet. Nevertheless, external pressure rules that the show must go on pending a new date for weighing and signing of agreement.
PHRASE OF THE MONTH: "Brokeback"
----------------------------------------------------------
SURF TRIPS NOTICE
Some of us have been making return trips to Cherating since Chinese New Year weekend. The report was that mainpoint at Cherating offered really long rides and clean walls. Little wonder that the number of surfers who stay faithful to Desaru has been dwindling although Watermelon and Sedili were still pretty surfable despite the wind and brown water. A few even went as far as the Phillippines and Cimaja for their surf treats. Max had a free trip to surf Tioman, Malaysia courtesy of Tioman Tourism Board and hopefully we can all see him in the magazines soon.
----------------------------------------------------------
Disclaimer: The articles featured here are based on words of mouth and assumptions and no verbal, mental or physical abuse shall be inflicted upon the writer of these articles.
---------------------------------------------------------
OLD SKOOL LONGBOARDER DIRTY SECRET
Mike Lim has finally confessed to his favourite ocean manouevre: taking a dump in the sea. Taking a pee is no longer a secret for any of us. I know most of you would rather do it in the sea than take that walk all the way up to the nearest bush or toilet. But taking a dump?
"Everybody do it. There are only two sorts: those who confess and those who don't," quipped Mike.
Since this could be your survival tip, here are his tips:
1. Paddle outside to a quiet corner.
2. Remove boardshorts underwater.
3. Check the direction of current. You don't want the banana to float back to you.
4. Don't take too long. Some passing fish might just mistake your little member for some bait. Perform a quick manouvre. One push, one go. Just do it.
5. Put shorts back on.
6. Paddle back to the line up as if nothing happened.
So there you go, the art of taking dump in the sea. Any last words, Mike? "The sea's a big dumping ground anyway! That's what I call freedom!"
We'll be interviewing Ajill soon for his tips.
----------------------------------------------------------
THE INSIDE TRUTH ABOUT ANDI'S JEANS
-
Andi Lim has been abstaining from alcohol recently. That was strange until he confessed that his doctor had advised him against it. Upon futher probing he revealed that he had had an infection to his downunder member.
Too much sex, perchance? "No!" he vehemently denied. And so after some persuasion, it turned out that he is not in the habit of washing his jeans for months on end. Okey, so what, you asked, we all hardly ever washed our jeans.
Okey folks, get ready for this: Andi never wears his underwear. Not only when he's in the water but when he's about town shopping in his jeans or any trousers for that matter. "It's just too hot!" he said.
Maybe Max would like to give our Andi some advice.
----------------------------------------------------------
MARKO'S SPOTTED!
Despite his emotionally-charged
protests and pleadings, guys, check out Marko's new look in the attached picture. He was caught off-guard standing at Cathay Cineleisure by our paparazzi. He didn't want any of you to know, but yes, he has started his job proper. He even had his hair trimmed to suit his new look. What caught our eyes however, is his polished gold-buckle belt which shone even in this underexposed photo.---------------------------------------
IAN'S DAYDREAMING
This comes from an sms Ian sent to one his pals last month that we managed to salvage from obscurity and print for all of you:
"Oh man that's the ultimate.. Check her curves out. Smooth, yet strong and firm. Won't bounce in the waves. She will hold her course. Step on her hard and she will give you good spray of delight. Think I can handle her for the whole day in 'saru. If I have the energy, might make it on Sunday. But I'm sure she will give me
the ride of a time, fulfilling my every need. Everything and anything you want. Sorry got carried away. Got to get back to work!"
Ian's obejct of desire? A 5'10" retro Fish.
----------------------------------------------------------
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Contest between Ian and Fity to lose weight has been postponed due to both party's reluctance to cut down on their unhealthy diet. Nevertheless, external pressure rules that the show must go on pending a new date for weighing and signing of agreement.
PHRASE OF THE MONTH: "Brokeback"
----------------------------------------------------------
SURF TRIPS NOTICE
Some of us have been making return trips to Cherating since Chinese New Year weekend. The report was that mainpoint at Cherating offered really long rides and clean walls. Little wonder that the number of surfers who stay faithful to Desaru has been dwindling although Watermelon and Sedili were still pretty surfable despite the wind and brown water. A few even went as far as the Phillippines and Cimaja for their surf treats. Max had a free trip to surf Tioman, Malaysia courtesy of Tioman Tourism Board and hopefully we can all see him in the magazines soon.
----------------------------------------------------------
posted by i-surf-small-wave at 11:43
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home